Review: Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)

Before I start this review, let me address the elephant in the room when it comes to today's trend in horror movies: the remake. I grew up watching the staples of the horror genre: A Nightmare on Elm Street, Friday the 13th, Halloween, Hellraiser, and of course the gaggle of sequels churned out by each franchise. So to have to sit and watch Michael "Make Things Go Boom" Bay gobble up all of the rights to these movies just so he can profit off of the name is pretty heart-wrenching. You know damn well the movies won't be as good as the original, but the name has the power to make us buy a ticket even though we will probably walk away disappointed. And here is where I think Michael Bay has horror fans of my generation by the balls. Being born in 1984, I wasn't even alive for the premiere of most of these movies, and I was way too young to go have my parents take me to the theater to see any of the sequels. So, I had to make do either waiting for them to come out on TV or by renting them on video. I never really got to experience the event of going out, cheerily buying overpriced popcorn, and seeing these icons on the big screen. The remakes coming out today give us a chance to do so.

Now when it comes specifically to remaking A Nightmare on Elm Street, there were a couple of other factors that intrigued me. Firstly, modern special effects would allow for more creativity when playing with the dream sequences in the movie. Even though the effects in the original movie were pretty damn creative for their day, I could see a case for improved visuals with updated technology and I wanted to see if director Samuel Bayer could utilize them well. After watching the movie, I can say that in some ways he did, and in some ways he really, reeeeeeally didn't. When it came to developing a frightening atmosphere, the effects were right on the mark. We see a classroom full of students disintegrate into ash as one of the teens (I really don't feel like remembering who was who) falls asleep during school. We watch blood burst in a torrent from the ceiling (a nod to the blood volcano from the original, perhaps?). And the line between reality and dream is constantly blurring in a way that just wasn't possible when the original movie was produced. However, as often happens in horror movies nowadays, computer-generated imagery (CGI) was very overused. The drawback to CGI is that 9 times out of 10, I can tell that it's CGI. Freddy's make up is the prime example for this movie. I read that they were going for a look that more closely resembled the effects of being badly burned which I supposed they needed to do through CGI, but if you know that's what you're looking at then it's that much harder to pretend it's real and get lost in the movie.

This shit is seamless...as long as I don't move or speak.

Speaking of Freddy, the other thing that interested me about the new Nightmare was the choice of Jackie Earle Haley as the new Freddy Krueger. Now, for most fans of the original movies, casting someone other than Robert Englund as Freddy automatically counts for strikes one, two, and three. But if they were going to recast the role, I really can't think of anyone better than Jackie Earle Haley. I was as surprised as anyone when they cast Kelly Leak from the Bad News Bears as Rorshach for the recent film adaptation of The Watchmen, but I think you'd be hard-pressed to find someone else who could turn a small, skinny redhead into such a believable badass. So why couldn't he do the same for Freddy? Unfortunately, his role was usually just a Robert Englund impression of hammy one-liners. Haley does alright with this but it seems a bit forced. He really shines through, however, when Freddy's rage boils over. Just as with Rorshach, a pissed off Jackie Earle Haley is a terrifying Jackie Earle Haley. But Freddy rarely reaches that point, so Haley's abilities were squandered.

***Spoiler Alert*** The writers also waste what appears to be a good opportunity to make their own unique vision of Freddy Krueger. In the original films, Freddy was a evil child killer before and after he was killed by the parents of Springwood. In the updated version, more emphasis is put on Freddy as a pedophile rather than a murderer, and throughout the movie they toy with the idea that maybe Kruger was innocent and wrongly accused and murdered by overanxious parents. This idea is dropped, however, when we learn that Freddy was indeed guilty and deserved whatever he got. But I can't help wonder if it wouldn't have been more interesting had they made the movie their own by making the human incarnation of Freddy be innocent. Now, the Freddy that haunts our dreams should not be a sympathetic character. We all know and love Freddy as a sadistic demon who will psychologically and physically torture his victims. But what of this demon was created not by the inherent evil of a man, but by the actions of those who thought he was evil. I don't know, it's just a thought. ***End Spoiler***

Now, as remakes go, this one wasn't terrible. The obligatory twenty-something actors playing teenagers were all passable, I had a good time with the various surprise scares, the gore left me satisfied, and honestly I just enjoyed the nostalgic value of bringing back something fun from my childhood (screw you normal people and your Sesame Street). If you can put aside the fact that Michael Bay probably had no business making the movie in the first place, you can probably get some entertainment out of it. If you don't need to make an event out if it like I did, however, you might just want to wait for it to come out on DVD. Grade: C+

Author Recommendation: Jonathan Maberry

Well, I've been doing this segment for a few weeks now, and so far I've covered music, food, TV, and movies as a source of distraction for the increasingly irritating world that we live in. I realize, however, that I haven't talked about anything to do with reading. So this week I'd like to prove that I'm not illiterate by introducing you to one of my favorite authors, Jonathan Maberry.

I stumbled on Maberry's work by blind luck one day at Border's horror section. I was looking for something new without having much of a plan, so I utilized my fool-proof technique of looking for a book with an interesting cover. Screw reading book reviews or getting recommendations from friends. That's for weak-minded people who are too afraid to take things at face value (I came this close to using "judge a book by its cover," but I just couldn't bring myself to do it). In the case of Maberry's novel Bad Moon Rising, I distinctly remember the first thing that attracted me to it was that the cover was red. I know, I have quite the analytical mind.

As someone who grew up surrounded by farmland in Lancaster, PA, the house on the cover was both creepy and familiar, which piqued my interest. Then when I found out on the back cover that the story actually takes place in Pennsylvania, I knew that this was the book for me... but not quite yet. This was actually the third book of what's become known as the Pine Deep trilogy, a story that follows the survivors of an evil werewolf only to have to face his resurrection 30 years later. So, I picked up the first book of the trilogy, Ghost Road Blues, and started what has become the best series of books that I've ever read.

Before we go any further, I should warn you that if you are looking for a life-changing experience out of this read, you've come to the wrong place. Dostoevski this is not. It is a perfect read for people who, like me, love the horror of the 80s. This is a world of vampires and werewolves, and unlike other book series that rhyme with Schwilight, these vampires and werewolves are actually threatening. They provide plenty of action and even more gore, and Maberry weaves a mythology that interweaves their existence in a very interesting way.

Maberry also has a talent for is writing a very likeable hero. Malcom Crow is the perfect balance between vulnerable everyman and certifiable badass. As a former cop turned store owner/haunted hayride manager, he's basically what you would get if everyone's favorite, unassuming neighbor was actually dealing with the psychological effects of being attacked by a werewolf as a child and had the ability to break both of your legs with his bare hands.

And that's another thing: Jonathan Maberry depicts a fight scene better than anyone I've ever read. According to his Wikipedia page, Maberry is an 8th degree black belt in Shinowara-ryu Jujitsu and his official website lists several books that he's written on martial arts. This experience really comes through in his writing, as he takes the reader through the mind of each fighter and realistically (or at least as realistically as can be expected in a book with vampires and werewolves) describes each blow's intention and consequence in a way that is easy to visualize.

Maberry actually does a great job of helping the reader visualize everything in the world he's created. As someone who has pretty much killed is sense of imagination by relying on movies and TV to provide one for me, I often find myself lost in the gobbledy gook of description in a novel. Maberry, however, had me visualizing everything as if I were in fact watching a movie. Now, this could be because the story takes place in a fictional Pennsylvania town that I imagine to look very much like the places I've lived, but I think more of it has to do with Maberry's ability to describe a scene without trying to be too clever and therefore getting his head stuck in his ass. He's efficient in his descriptions, and that makes me as a reader get lost in the novel very easily.

My one and only complaint in Maberry's writing is that he sometimes makes references that will inherently date his material. Maybe it's just me, but it feels weird having someone refer to a character in a novel use an iPod. I realize the iPod probably isn't going anywhere so people reading Maberry's stuff in the future will know what he's talking about, but something about his references feel like he just thought of something popular off the top of his head without giving it much significance. This is especially true in contrast to the blues songs that he quotes throughout the book, that have an important relevance to the narration.

Nonsensical nitpicking aside, the Pine Deep trilogy only took me a month or
two to read, which for someone like me is a lightening fast pace (hm, maybe I am illiterate). It was one of those reads that I knew I was going to love within one page, and it's stayed with me ever since. His next trilogy based on a new character, Joe Ledger, starts off on the right foot with Patient Zero, a book that delves into the world of terrorists and zombies. Honestly, I don't think I should have to say anything more about that. Terrorists! Zombies! And trust me, I've read it and it's as awesome as it sounds. So, as with everything else I recommend, get off your ass right now and give Jonathan Maberry a try. My plan is to head out ASAP to pick up his newest Joe Ledger novel, The Dragon Factory.